Tag Archives: Life

My darkest Truth

I could only describe it as a chasm that kept growing,

A monster that never got fed,

A hollow hole that had no end,

 

I couldn’t shake it,

The fear that crippled me,

The constant taunting of my own soul

 

 

I cried for it to stop,

But the feeling grew stronger,

My deepest fear stood before me

Without blinking,

It started at me,

As if it knew me

 

I tried to look away,

But I couldn’t

It looked too familiar,

Like a distant person I once knew

 

Could this be an attempt to save my soul?

 

Without hesitation I ran to it,

Ran to the fear that stood before me,

I wanted to embrace it,

Desired to know it,

Perhaps then,

The feeling would subside

 

I held out my hand to touch it,

But then retreated.

 

I was in the middle of my stride when I woke up.

 

You see, even in my dreams,

I was too afraid to face the truth.

 

Aisha-Nicole 2016

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#93: A Game of Charades

I could hear him crying in the bathroom,

It was the third time this week,

And as much as he tried to lie,

He was just as broken as the rest of us,

 

He was the master of charades,

Every smile he ever wore was a front,

A constant effort to be strong,

To have it all together,

 

He stifled his cries,

But I could feel the vibrating pulses of a broken soul,

The door opened,

And I saw his silhouette,

 

Against the back drop of the bathroom light,

I saw him smile again,

It didn’t take him to long,

To return to his game of charades

 

© Aisha-Nicole 2016

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#89: Dying Alone

“I cried when I realized he had lived his whole life a complete lie.”

© Aisha- Nicole 2015

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#86: Sharp Tongues,

Sharp Tongues,

Today I saw a man die,

I saw words cut through his flesh,

I saw blood poured out,

As words infected blood lines,

And I watched closely,

As those called family,

Derailed his identity carelessly,

“sticks and bones they said”

I remembered the schoolyard rhyme

“but words will never hurt me”

 I wish those school yard kids,

 could see what I see

As I painfully stood witness,

To a man die slowly,

As sharp tongues with no remorse,

Willfully cut him deeply.

©Aisha-Nicole 2015

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#65: Life Value

What is the value of life?

How do we determine the great and the easily forgotten?

Is it by accomplishments or likability?

Or is it by the sheer fact that they lived and were loved?

Life is here and gone tomorrow,

Just ask those that are laying in their graves

©Aisha-Nicole 2014

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#63: I would

I would fight for you

lie for you

climb Mountains for you

What I won’t do

Is sell my soul for you

©Aisha-Nicole 2014

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#56: Forgiven

She was in labor,

In a few hours she would bare the child of her rapist

Left alone to do the bloody work

She had no choice in this matter,

Nor the latter,

 

She begged to die,

Holding her breath,

She made one more attempt to end her life,

And its life,

 

She hadn’t even thought of a name,

Unwilling to sit side by side with reality,

She forced herself to forget,

Neglect the changes in her body,

Ignore occasional kicks,

Or sudden urges for midnight snacks

Accompanied with some panic attacks,

 

She was now that girl,

The unfortunate,

The poster child of fates ill hand

 

Inside

She caved daily,

Cursing the stars,

Waiting for its arrival,

She drank denial,

And Let it seduce her,

 

But tonight the affair ended,

At dawn reality seeped in to cash its prize

Eye to eye,

She stared at the child of her rapist

 

“What will you name him?”

She looked away

And then softly said,

 

“I will name him forgiven”

 

©Aisha-Nicole 2014

 

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#52: It was,

It was the silence,

The silent tap of heavens waterfall

It was the fresh smell of crisp laundry

It was the instant gratification

It was your smile

It was the silence

And then it was the moment

And now it’s the past

And here I write

Sill captivated by its presence

 

©Aisha-Nicole 2013

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#50: Three’s a Company.

In between warm sheets,

Under soft lights and city vibes,

You and I lay hand in hand,

But you didn’t see lonely creep in,

He stood by the door way,

His silhouette mocking every kiss and every soft hand gesture,

He was even there when you whispered I love you-

 

And while you were gone,

He crept into the sheets,

The bed was warm,

But his hands were cold and soon the sheets were too-

So please,

Don’t be mad at me,

I tried,

I would even die trying

 

But I’m tired,

Tired of lying

Tired of attempting to push aside every doubt that this will ever work,

Trying to deny that lonely hasn’t caught up to me,

He’s in the bed baby,

 

And three’s always been a company

 

©Aisha-Nicole 2013

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#46: Open Hands-

Open Hands-

 

Calloused with years of trying to fix it over and over again,

Finger tips that no longer sense,

Hanging helplessly, at the end of open hands,

These hands,

Buy time until once again

The cycle begins,

Aiding and imbedding lies,

Intertwined in false harmony,

Holding tightly to the warmth of future dreams,

Only to be exposed to closed fists,

Emotional rollercoasters,

And nights of blue pretense,

 

Open hands-

 

Trying once again,

This time,

They open slower,

One fingertip at a time,

To shy and too afraid to expose

Long lines of pain,

Occasional Rough spots,

And signs of abandonment,

My hands,

Wait for the reunion with your hands-

 

But they won’t wait forever

 

                                       

©Aisha-Nicole 2013

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